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Master Danger Complains, Post #8 - Laura Wise

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May 18th, 2015

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05:49 pm - Master Danger Complains, Post #8
Dear people who read this Livejournal,

Somebody come save me.

Here I am, Master Danger, minding my own business, living my life. Barking at the dogs next door (who need me to come through that fence and teach them a lesson, but I am Not Allowed), barking at crows and other birds, alerting L to the passing of large trucks and schoolbusses, hogging the fan, requiring treats and attention at regular intervals. You know, the usual.

But it is ALSO that time of year when I start to lose my undercoat. As a double-coated animal, I have a white fur coat underneath my red fur, and when it's time to blow coat, huge chunks of white fur lift off my skin, just waiting for a good time to drop and turn into fur tumbleweeds. But until then, sure, I look a little ragged.

So my owner has tried to brush me, which, NO THANK YOU. I've expressed my displeasure by gentle snapping -- I'm not really trying to make contact -- and so L has resorted to... picking at me. Like, I think I'm going to get my 30 seconds of petting followed by a treat, but instead of petting, she pulls out fur chunks.


So I'm making myself available for other offers. I don't want to live with other dogs, cats, children, or really people, but I don't want to be alone either. So work that out amongst yourselves and then SAVE ME.

Master Danger

(19 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture]
Date:May 19th, 2015 01:49 am (UTC)
Dear Master Danger,

We regret to inform you that we have no room here for canines, especially snappish ones. We wish you success in your quest. We must point out, however, that on the whole, one is better off with the human one has, not the human one wishes one has or might have at a later time.


Shadow and Patches, Felines in Residence

L, hugs and good luck with the Season of Blowing Coats

[User Picture]
Date:May 19th, 2015 05:00 pm (UTC)
Dear Cats,

Better off with the human I have??? Well, it's a theory.

Master Danger

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